Memoirs of Ms. Batoul Soltani – Part two
In his phone calls, Masud Rajavi tried to know why I was upset by making jokes and having fun. He wanted to know what my problem was. I didn’t tell him what my problem was. I was very sad. I had many questions on the organization. I felt that I have lost all my life, wasting my lifetime for looking for nothing. I even saw that the organization didn’t obey its own principles. For example, at that time, we claimed to be anti-Imperialism so much, but I saw how they spread red carpet for the Americans in Camp Ashraf welcoming them warmly. They named the cooperation with Americans as the struggle with the main enemy which is Islamic Republic, saying that
“It doesn’t matter to negotiate with the US to fight the main enemy.”
Sometimes, I asked them:
” why do you make the youth miserable by bringing them to the organization? Why haven’t we overthrown the regime yet after two decades? Or why are we struggling at all?”
However I was stuck in vain, this was not a factor to make me escape or leave the organization until the day I was working on the computer and I entered the private network of Mozhgan Parsaie. In fact I was supposed to fix their network. In one of their rooms, I entered Mozhgan Parsaie’s network where she had prepared a report which was supposed to be sent to Maryam Rajavi. I read the report and I saw what she had written about me. I got shocked extremely wondering what the reason of all respects they had for me was and what this report is. I felt they are so hypocrite and the word hypocrite really deserves them. They had back-bitted about me writing anything they could write about me although I was a member of Leadership Council. For instance they had written that I have moral problems or I have problems with children etc…. they had stated that my situation was so crucial. So I got very upset since they had wasted my life. I was looking for a way to carry out my decision and soon I was able to pack my bag and escape from the camp. We were seriously controlled.
We couldn’t walk around the camp alone. The low-ranking members were told:
“You may be arrested or kidnapped by the others who traffic the camp.”
The members do not trust anybody. They are always monitoring each other. I was in the Leadership Council, so I know that they falsely say that
“We do not allow the women to walk alone due to lack of security in the camp.“
In fact they want to cover the reality of their jobs.
The women were controlled in a particular way, so strictly, that Rajavi had soon sworn that
“We have no female defector”,
The control over the women members were more sever because he wanted to prove his claim.
Since I couldn’t get out alone, I planned a way to escape. At the sunset time, I put a back bag on the front seat of my jeep and I put a cap and a scarf on the pack bag to make the figure of a woman. Therefore I could pass the control station. I told them that my colleague is taking a nap on the front seat. So I could get out until I reached the street around the camp where I parked the car and walked out of the prison I had spent so many years of my life: Two decades of my life, from the moment I was recruited by the cult until the time I could run away by a complex plan. When I was escaping from the camp, I didn’t intend to go to TIPF (the American camp). I had some tools such as a wire cutter to cut the barbed wires and walk out of the camp. I knew that there are some hungry dogs wondering around the camp. I brought some food to give them in case of the risk of their attack. When I entered the deserts around the camp and I was walking towards the cast, I encountered the dogs. So I gave the food and water to them. They became my friends and escorted me.
But when I got to the barbed wires I found out that I had lost my wire cutter when I was trying to feed the dogs. So I changed my plan and decided to go to American camp. I came towards the American camp and tried to draw the soldiers’ attention to myself, but they couldn’t hear me because they were listening to music by their headsets. I tried to shout, using my English. I told them that
“I am a woman who escaped from MKO camp and I don’t want the organization learns about me.”
Finally I could get in the camp of American forces.
In the camp, MKO tried to contact me, in many ways. They sent me letters, messages,.. They even called me on the cell phones which were held secretly in the American camp. They wanted me to get back to Ashraf promising me to do anything I want such as going to Europe or giving financial aids. Then they launched a large attempt to attract me by my children. They knew that I was looking for my children. They particularly wanted to bring my daughter to camp Ashraf so as I would get back. They even had her supervisor, in Europe, call me so that they can control me out of Camp Ashraf and even abroad. But I never let them get close to me. They had taken my daughter as a hostage; she wasn’t allowed to call me. She was told a lot of nonsense about me. They had even told her to have an interview against me but she hadn’t accepted because she was busy with her studies and her personal life.
I stayed in TIPF for a period of time. Americans suggested working for them. I did their computer works about storage of their goods listing them in the computer and I was paid 2.5 dollars an hour.
Meanwhile I had some contacts with my family. I was sometimes afraid of my future life. I was afraid of making mistake. I didn’t know what was waiting for me. Sometimes I got disappointed. The organization was also trying hard to have me back with promises of money or a free life in Europe but I was sure that I would have no way out with MKO except that same isolated cult.
We had many difficulties in TIPF. The Americans didn’t help us; instead they aided the organization to become more stable, for example they recognized Mozjgan Parsaie but not the separated members of the cult. The organization used the opportunity and expanded its control and hegemony over the members more and more. The pressure of the meetings was increased.
In the meetings, about 300 people were shouting at an individual asking him or her:
” what is in your mind? Why do you want to leave the camp? Why do you think about your children or husband?”
When I just remember these memories, I get terrified. So I didn’t think about any of their suggestions. In my contacts with my family, they couldn’t help me so much they wanted to help me in their own way offering their emotions and sympathy.
To be continued